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Wednesday, April 26, 2017

It's All BUTT Love - Social Media Experiement

What does it take to do all of those Facebook Live, Instagram, and Snapchat videos? Considering how many of them show such mundane instances in one's day, one should wonder how much time they are wasting by watching them.

Case in point, I don't need to see you grocery shopping. Or walking to work. Or walking to your next gig... All with a stoic look on your face. IDGAF because...


And the answer is...


This has always ran through my mind, but I thought more deeply about this while making the following video I posted on Instagram:

Afterwards, I left everything but my smartphone and the my Tenga Flip Zero. Did what I said I was going to do with my Flip Zero, then went to bed. When I woke up the following morning, I came up with the idea to give this narcissistic craze a whirl. But to make it not be totally pointless, I still made it contribute to my brand.

So I decided to dance naked. I  told you I contributed to my brand. With every decision from the song, how much of the song, as well as how much of my body would show was decided upon, set up a tad more, and shot in less than an hour.

My decision after this was if it took that much work to quickly put together something that might actually contribute to the part of my brand meant to showcase the sex appeal of males over 30, especially of color, then what the fuck is wrong with the social skills of guys who take the time to post videos that contribute absolutely nothing to their brand.

It's fuckin' ridiculous!!!

Well, this is the end result of that experiment. It has gotten 800+ views at the time of writing this post. So I hope my snap decision to do this experiment contributes to my brand of representing being black, sexy, fit, high energy, while over 40.

What do you think?

Tuesday, April 11, 2017

Webcam Sites & OhMiBod... Oh My God, Their Greed!

Have you ever heard of OhMiBod? You might have seem them on gay webcam sites. If so, there's very likely a problem you don't know about, but we need to address.

The problem is that some of these webcam models are using OhMiBod toys that are not made for anal use at all. Proof of them not being anal-safe is their lack of a base to work against the suction abilities of the rectum. So from here on out remember that all sex toys that are truly anal-safe have a base.

With that said, the webcam models are not using the toys in a fashion that could possibly make them anal-safe. And there is a way to make them anal-safe. The reason I won't tell it here is because I am not doing the work OhMiBod should have done, which is to pass that information on to webcam sites before striking up such a deal. They all allowed their greed to lead them along the irresponsible route, so let them pay the price. Because I am not picking up where they fucked up.

Especially after how back in January, I wrote the following tweet addressing this matter:
As you can see, I tagged OhMiBod along with 2 webcam sites.

and RandyBlueLive.

You can see why those 2 sites. For if you look closely, you can see the words "OhMiBod" on the screen advertising their use of OhMiBod's product. So would you believe I never got a tweeted response back from any of them?That says to me that either:
  1.  they don't deem me as a qualified source of information; 
  2. because of my level of notoriety, they don't see me as a threat publicly addressing this; 
  3. they are so arrogant about their collaboration and the money made at the risk of these models' health that they simply don't care, or;
  4. a combination of at least 2 of the aforementioned.
A clear sign of the greed involved is how OhMiBod's website does have a link that says Rear Gear. However, not a single OhMiBod toy you see those models using on the aforementioned cam sites is on that page.

Every OhMiBod toy used on webcam sites are the toys marketed for remote controlled stimulation of the clitoris and/or vagina. So these toys should not be used anally by a male, or a female.
If you recall the aforementioned tweet, I included a hashtag that says #AnalToysNeedABase". Now, feel free to enlarge and look closely at each of those screenshots. Do you see a base on either of those toys? I don't. And that is a recipe for disaster, Especially if someone who doesn't have a tight enough hole tries to do what these and other webcam models are doing.

And between guys doing poppers, fisting, and/or being size-queens without doing Kegels, there are a lot of buttholes out there that are loose. Loose enough to have these toys vibrate right up inside them, resulting in a trip to an emergency room.

Who knows. Maybe one of your favorite webcam models is already a casualty. For it he has ever suddenly disappeared from their live show, and came back no longer playing with such toys, now you know a possible reason why.

This deal between OhMiBod and these webcam sites was made in total disregard for the hashtag:


So in this matter, I hold OhMiBod way more responsible than the webcam sites or their models. For one, a sex toy company should know better. Meanwhile, webcam sites are like porn actors and most of the porn industry since it's an industry of, not fucking how you know is right, but instead fucking how you're told to. Sadly, in order to remain relevant, performers do the latter. They do what they are told. Putting their faith in directors and website owners who know nothing, and don't take the time to learn because they are too busy being leeches living vicariously through the desperation for validation by the performers. So in the end,... most in the porn industry have no fucking clue about mentally and physically healthy sex.

With that said, unless they have a degree or done thorough scientific reading about sex, most of these sites (especially gay sites) that use pornstars are teachers are doing a disservice to the community.

So what right do I have to be a teacher. It's not just the training I got from my present day job at The Pleasure Chest. It's because for years before working there, even before losing my virginity, I was using the photos in books about sex as masturbation material, but also reading the surrounding literature.

That knowledge has led me to be able to say all of this. Which needs to be said because the love of this idea of using OhMiBod toys not meant to be used anally has gotten to the point that there are compilation videos on tube sites of guys using these toys. I even found a video of Bel Ami pornstar Kevin Warhol using one in a cam show.

Now, based on all that I have said, you might watch these videos and get off on them so much that you shoot a load of jizz so plenty and poorly landing that it shorts out your laptop. But try using those toys yourself in that fashion. If you are one of those who might possibly have a loose hole for the aforementioned reasons, your outcome might not be so lucky.

Even with my extreme sexual curiosity and self-proclaimed tight hole, I refuse to chance trying these toys. Hence why I'm recommending the same for you.

So this post is not about slamming a toy company, or webcam sites. It's about me sticking to my mission before, during, and more so after porn:
Putting you in the know about things that can enhance, maintain, or damper your sexual ecstasy.

Using OhMiBod toys in this fashion has too high a risk of being a damper. And we can't have that.

Wednesday, April 5, 2017

From Porn to Poet, ...Who Would've Predicted?

April 1, 2005...

That was the day of my gay porn debut. Performing a solo show for the now extinct website, Showguys.com. Back when most live online sex shows had a host. Unlike today, with the models doing all of the work themselves.

I got the gig by answering an ad in the (also extinct) NYC gay nightlife magazine, HX. With the plans of using it, and every porn gig after to become a known pornstar. So I could do for others questioning their sexual orientation what gay porn had done for me. That being ---showing me gay/bi males comfortable with their sexuality. So I thought.

After learning most pornstars are anything but comfortable with their sexuality, my blogging, which I initially began to promote my porn persona of "Tré Xavier", transformed into a means to wake up the gay community to how gay porn is not the influence and inspiration to our sexual behavior that many emulate, but by no means should.

Unfortunately, the Borg-like racist white domination of the gay porn industry and gay media gave me few opportunities to be heard. Hence why some of my blogged messages to the community to this day have been slow to grow throughout the community. OR have been stolen by those gay media sites never responding to my inquiries about handling the subject matter. In which case, the story is handed off to either white authors, or a different author of color. In either case, handling the issue with kid gloves, which underrates its severity. And in the case of a white author, them having no firsthand experience of what we people of color must endure too often leads to an article that preaches to the choir. Instead of enlightening those whites whose racism want their new knowledge coming from a white source.

Between trying to fight porn directors' and performers' racism, selfishness, prostitution, being gay-for-pay bitches in denial, and an "every-man-for-himself" mindset, I finally owned how much "fun" the gay porn industry was NOT. So on September 23, 2009, I announced my retirement from the industry.

After announcing that retirement, I had a state of saying to myself, "What now?"

Along with that "what now?", I also had to figure out how to silence the ghosts. The ghosts of the gay porn industry that haunted me because I had all of this knowledge about it that could put a stop to many misconceptions, but they only lived in my head... At least for the moment. 

Then one day, a poem popped in my head. I used to write poetry all the time as a kid, which then morphed into songwriting when I started having aspirations to be a singer. So that poem was me going back to some good basics.

After that poem however, came another, then another, then another, then another. All about stories of what I've witnessed in the gay porn industry. Now, I had to get the stories out there. So I approached Men of All Colors Together/NY about doing a poetry reading, and Q & A, simply titled "The Industry". And they said, YES.

The host of one of the sex parties I attended at the time promoted the event in his emails. The clothes check guy at the last party I attended before the event said, "Something good is going to come out of this, you watch."

While my outside voice said to him, "From your mouth to God's ears", my inside voice thought, "This guy is off his fuckin' rocker! Ain't shit going to come out of this, but a one-night-only release of a few behind-the-scenes porn stories."

Well, I'm man enough to admit when I have been proven wrong. For not only did it get gay porn blog coverage due to a live impromptu debate between myself and token black guy of the time, Diesel Washington. More importantly was me waking up the next morning to an email from someone who was in attendance at my reading.

By reading the email, this person acknowledged his connection to The Leslie-Lohman Museum of Gay & Lesbian Art, which resulted in the nude modeling I did for their drawing studio. As well as his being on the board for The Rainbow Book Fair. Hence why I have been in the lineup for their Poetry Salon since the year of my poetry reading, 2011.

And I am pleased to announce that I have been invited back again.

So April 29th. I hope to see you there.

Who would have predicted that 12 years from the first time I stepped in front of a porn industry's camera that I would be where I am now?

Someone slowly but surely gaining notoriety as an erotic poet, erotic storyteller, sex toy reviewer,  and sex blogger. In short, to some, a sexpert.

Well, I never saw it coming. But I'm also not mad about it. For it has saved me from an outcome of most porn actors, both living and dead. My exhibitionist spirit still lives, and my creative talents are not stalemated.

Just goes to show how all it takes is one right person to have faith in you.

Tuesday, March 21, 2017

A Hummingbird Rides A Magic Wand

Sometime ago, I made a video with a Magic Wand and a male attachment for it called a Hummingbird. That was with the old Magic Wand before they came out with a rechargeable one.

Well, I have recently acquired a rechargeable Magic Wand, and decided to make a better video. One that is more hands free to see if a Magic Wand with a Hummingbird makes less work for us guys.

So here's 3 minutes and 47 seconds to give you an answer... An answer you'll actually get about 2 minutes in....

Sunday, March 19, 2017


I've been deliberating about this for awhile now, but I'm entering again.

Gay media has puked out foul messages about medium to dark men of color, and men 30+ for the longest. Saying we either never had naked sex appeal because of our color, or we lose our naked sex appeal because of our age. Well, someone needs to take a stand and flip the bird to that.

So for me, while winning would be nice, it's not about winning. It's about not sitting in the crowd. For I feel sitting in the crowd when your have the goods to take to the stage confirms those aforementioned foul messages. So I hope to see you there to cheer me on.

Monday, February 6, 2017

Poppers & Pjur

Many gay males are first introduced to poppers when they bottom, and some top urges them to use poppers as an aid to make the bottom loosen up their buttholes. The main reasons for this is because:

  1. the bottom complains of pain because they did not properly prepare themselves for anal sex;
  2. the top can't maintain an erection to enter or proceed with the sex, because of a bottom's tightness, or;
  3. the top doesn't want to put in the work to relax their bottoming playmate for their entry.
If none of these are at play, then that user of poppers is using them out of addiction. An addiction that might have started out of one or more of the aforementioned reasons. So if you fit in that criteria, reading on is still very much advised. For if you take note of the source of your present harm, you can begin stopping yourself from doing further harm.

Many gay males still believe poppers aid them in bottoming. And more and more it seems, they have passed this idea on to their straight female friends. So this is a post of extreme concern. For as I have said numerous times before, poppers are a chemical. A chemical that if you were to drink that bottle instead of huff from it, you would wind up either extremely sick, or dead. And while you think huffing on it does no harm because no reports have come out to tell you otherwise, there's a simple reason for that.

The reason agencies and sex shops aren't more vigilant in telling you the truth of what poppers are doing to your body is because they're money-makers. The problem is that they are money makers at the expense of your health. All because you believed a lie.

These agencies won't tell you otherwise because most of them are anti-gay. Therefore, poppers are a money-maker to further their agenda of making us seem like our "lifestyle" makes us more prone to substance abuse than their "straight" "Christian" selves. And it's bad for a sex shop to sell them for poppers work to the detriment of your sexual health, not the bettering of it.

This is not to say that I have never had a sexual encounter that made me consider using poppers. However, my initial attempts at using them resulted in me still feeling the pain poppers were to supposedly avoid. So with my being a substance experimenter, but not an abuser, as well as being aware of the stigma of how being gay and being a substance abuser go hand in hand, I was determined to enjoy a cock chemically-free. So my Aries stubbornness and determination kicked in. Making me find a way to enjoy the feeling of a dick inside me. Without any harmful chemicals entering my body, then altering my mind. which would in turn make me not experience to the fullest the natural high that comes from a skilled top's dick sliding back and forth and throbbing in my ass tunnel.

With that goal, I realized that all you need is a good lube, desire, and relaxing oneself naturally to take in a cock. For I have been with guys who are thin to beer-can thick, short and long in length, as well as being in 1-on-1, tag teamed, gangbanged, and even once double penetrated. And even my most challenging of those sexual encounters were void of poppers.

By this point, I had already figured out how to have (with the exception of initial entry) pain-free anal sex. So it was out of total curiosity that after hearing that it contains jojoba oil to naturally relax the sphincter muscles, I one day bought a bottle of Pjur Back Door.

My 1st experimentation with Pjur Back Door was not on myself actually. It was on a fuck-buddy. He normally topped me. One day, he messaged me for a hook-up while I was at work. So I told him I would not be able to clean myself out like I normally would. I guess he wanted to play with me so much that he offered to bottom for me. I figured the tight hole of a guy who usually tops is the perfect guinea pig to see if Pjur Back Door really works.

I got to my fuck-buddy's place. After foreplay, he got on all fours making his nice ass available to me. I put some Pjur Back Door on him, and I slid right into him.

Then I had a hook-up where I tried it on myself. It turned out that the guy I hooked up with also used Pjur Back Door. He was my height, had a huge cock, but he fucked my ass harder than anyone I can recall. Totally dominating me. Yet, even during his initial entry into my ass, I felt no pain. I LOVED every second of it. Likely because the minute or so that it takes for the jojoba oil to do its job had already started by the time he entered me.

Jojoba oil doesn't smell like flowers, fruit, or candy. Nor does it smell like shit. However, because it makes the silicone lube have any scent at all, it will make those uneducated about jojoba oil think you have an accident to take care of, Even though you actually don't.

I first discovered this at my first attendance of an interracial sex party called Swirl. A couple of guys tried fooling around with me. They toyed with my hole. Realized I was already lubed up. Smelled their fingers, then left me alone. Knowing that I was beyond clean for this party, I put the pieces together, and realized that the light scent of the jojoba oil in the lube is what was making them take a step back.

Well, I guess one of the guys either got a quick education on jojoba by someone else, or he was just that horny for my ass. For sometime later, he came up behind me, directed me to a nearby bed, laid me down on my stomach, and pounded the holy fuck out of me.

Keep in mind that Pjur Back Door is made for more intense anal play, while Pjur's Analyse Me, which also contain jojoba oil is made for regular anal play. When I initially decided to get one of the two, I went for Back Door because it was me having one lube on hand for all of the anal play that I'm into. Including that next double-penetration that I hunger to experience.

Like Pjur's anal lubes, there are some other anal lubes that have natural ingredients. The difference between Pjur anal lubes and most other silicone-based anal lubes is that the natural ingredient in those other lubes usually contain clove oil. Clove oil is a natural ingredient, but it causes numbness, which will turn off that natural signal from your body to tell you that something is wrong - PAIN.

The jojoba oil in Pjur's anal lubes does not do that. With jojoba oil, your pain receptors are still on.

With this new information, please do a service to yourself and others. To yourself, stop believing the lie that poppers help you to bottom.

As a further service to yourself and others (such as sex shop customer assistants), stop putting yourself in the line of fire. For when you buy them in a sex shop, calling them "poppers" shows illegal intent. So you never know when a dutiful police officer might stop by. Enforcing whatever punishment they are permitted to give when they witness you asking for poppers by that term, and to the sex shop staffer directing you away from the word "poppers". For the only reason in this day and age for them to be sold in a sex shop is illegal.

Now, I'm am not going to mislead you here. Pjur silicone lube is by no means cheap. However, you are getting more quality to your sex and your life by spending money on Pjur's anal relaxing lubes than you would by spending that money on poppers.

I would like to use this post to advise Pjur to make small 10 mL bottles for sale. They're about the size of a small bottle of poppers. This way instead of you carrying a slowly, but surely brain cell-killing bottle of poppers in your pocket or sock, you can instead carry a quality lube. A lube that can relax your sphincter muscles like poppers do, but without the risk to your physical or mental health like poppers, and best of all, giving a nice, smooth ride in anal play. Regardless of what your role is in anal play.

The Pjur anal lubes that I mentioned here don't only come in silicone. They also come in water-based as well with hyaluron, instead of jojoba oil. Due to my success with the silicone-based version, I thought I would try their water-based ones for my sex toys. And you get to see the results for yourself. For if that bottle looks at all familiar to you as seeing it on this blog before, it's because you have.

It's the lube that I used in my video "Poppers,... We Don't Need No Stinkin' Poppers!" So I'll leave you with this sight, and your consideration of what I've said here.

Monday, January 30, 2017

Breeding Black Armor By White Insecurity

People are the products of their environment. These environments have often programmed their proclaimed standards long before you met them. If those standards contradict your own, those signs of that environment might fade a bit in your presence. Unfortunately, like a computer, they often reboot in that person when they leave your presence.

So since most media, events, and the most-respected people in gay society do not teach inclusiveness, we have moments where some (mainly blacks) get overwhelmed feeling like the outsider. Even if they normally forge head-first into the situation as a means to combat it, like myself.

Such a situation has people wearing an armor, even if the event has us totally naked. And with that, there comes a point when that armor must come off. You can and should take the armor off yourself. Otherwise, it will fall off unexpectedly. Resulting in awkward, and sometimes dangerous situations.

I usually take the armor off myself. By either the event ending in time, or me removing myself from the situation. Recently at a party however, I didn't do the latter, and the armor fell off. Thereby creating, not a dangerous situation, but definitely an awkward one.

The host had no idea as to what caused my usually cool, calm, and collected self to suddenly bolt out the door. I later explained giving a much more condensed version of what I'm saying here now.

Many black males experience this, but will seldom (if ever) reveal it out loud. Meanwhile, those whites and light people of color whose selfishness refuse to discuss racism since they so massively benefit from it need to learn empathy and compassion.

At the aforementioned party, I was fine a t first. However, the smaller the crowd got the more I felt the energy making me "the black man in the room". Many black male party-goers feel this. Either drinking themselves into stoopers, or making themselves the main drug connection for whites, and getting high with those whites to avoid feeling the reality of being "the black man in the room". That's why I'm more prone to address it. I'm always sober enough to see it, feel it, therefore remember every detail to acknowledge our community's moments of progress, but too often lack thereof.

Like I said, this is something I, and every other black male feels at just about any gay event in this country. And the only way to avoid it is to exile ourselves further by attending all-black parties like the one I mentioned in a Facebook post I wrote about a Latino I played with at a CumUnion party. And as a born and raised New Yorker, therefore a born and raised American, I should not have to exile myself like I'm in Pre-Civil Rights Movement America when the year is 2017. Especially when the heads of gay media, party promoters, and porn producers further inciting this racism are transplants to this multi-colored and multi-ethnic mecca that is my home.

Any black male you meet telling you they know not of what I speak is in denial. Either that, or they're telling you a bold-face lie to cover the guilt racially insensitive whites and bougie people of color try laying on us. Calling us blacks who speak honestly on this matter, "angry black men" if we dare to bring this matter up.

The question created by these situations are:
Why are blacks and other darker people of color still being made to feel inferior, when they are not by any means?

Well, the answer is the same as it has been throughout American history. It's what brought forth slavery. It's what brought forth segregation. It's what brought forth gender inequality along with too many other forms of inequality... WHITE MALE INSECURITY.

This insecurity is born out of how it is very likely encoded in our DNA that when we are put on any kind of pedestal, we fear the day (and way) we fall off of it. And it is inevitable that we will fall off of it. For every thing man produces has mortality.

So a white male's time on a pedestal appearing as the epitome of sex, beauty, and intellect; light-complexioned people of various ethnicities given those same props because the whites running media consider them as "passing"; all of the aforementioned seeing a person of a darker color or certain ethnicity, and initially liking what they see, but turn their eyes away just as quickly because the programming kicks in to think of those people as "ugly"; and for all of them, youth being their ticket to climbing that segregated ladder...

ALL OF IT WILL DIE AT SOME POINT. Ageism dismissing older gays will start it on its way. As for its final resting place, maybe not in my lifetime, or yours, but these ways of life will die. And no matter how much of a bravado is put on by those benefiting from that racism, every one of those people are dreading the day their time of being seen as a stud, a muse, or a genius dies.

Worst part of it is that for generations, these gay males still have never realized, therefore ignored teaching the next generation that the more they play into that racism, the more they act entitled to its perceived benefits, the more it's going to hurt when it's time to come down. It's probably because each generation had and has an arrogance saying things like, "I like what I like just because" or worst, "It will never happen to me."

Well, don't we already see the signs that beg to differ? For you can't miss seeing in the bars and clubs, the lonely old white and light-complexioned males buying lapdances and "alone time" with go-go boys. And long before that and very much on-going, how older guys are the main clients for escorts/prostitutes. So basically, those younger gays doing these gigs, are doing so for their lonely future selves.

How much worst does it have to get for us to realize that this RACISM (sexual and otherwise) NEEDS TO STOP???!!! All of this makes it clear how actions like this racism in the gay community creates a chain of livelihoods that shouldn't even be called "livelihoods". For they are making our community put on a happy face when in all actuality, we are imploding.

Therefore, all of the aforementioned acts create a path that benefits no one.

Monday, January 23, 2017

I'm Versatile, But I Prefer To....

I went to The Cock's Anniversary Party thrown by Daniel Nardicio. While standing around, a guy walked pass touching me to say "Hi". At first, my porn-induced PTSD that I've addressed before almost sent me into a violent rage. However, just as quickly as it was sparked, it was brought under control by realizing that I've met the guy before. Even more calming is the fact that every time we see each other, we flirt.

We got to catching up, talking about what I observed at that point about the crowd, and the conversation led to me talking about whether I'm a top, bottom, or versatile. Now, if you follow me on Facebook or Twitter, then you already know I'm versatile. But for some reason, he asked a question I've been asked before by others, and always danced around the question to avoid giving an answer. An act which is out of character for me, because this blog and my social media posts show that I'm normally quite forthcoming answering such questions about my sex life. Some things are off limits, but not that. So this time, I finally bit the bullet.

After I said I was versatile, the question he then asked was, "Which one do you prefer?"

I revealed my answer to be BOTTOM.

I paused for a moment to answer. Knowing my pause was not due to a shame towards bottoming. Proof of that lack of shame starts with my purposely going into gay porn as a bottom. Followed by my sex tales, captions on my Tumblr, sexual fantasies told on both, plus my refusal to date a popper-user. All of these make it obvious that I love the natural sensation of a cock riding back and forth inside my tight ass tunnel.  Whether that guy makes his cock move inside me with a slow romantic glide, the hard drilling of an extremely impassioned fuck, or any degree of vigor in between. The reason for my pause was because thanks to the media-induced perception of bottoms, my answer required some explanation.

The explanation that I gave is that looking back, bottoming has always been my preference. When I first imagined having sex with a guy, before knowing gay sex was anal sex, I thought of myself as a bottom. It wasn't until the night I lost my virginity that I realized that at some point, I would also top, and very easily become 50/50. Because when the guy I lost my virginity to wanted me to top him after he topped me, I couldn't. But I knew someday I would. And if not with him, then somebody else.

Also, when I masturbate, I assume the position of which I want to have sex in. So like most guys, I masturbate laying on my back. However, while a top lays on his back fantasizing about a bottom, I'm usually on my back imagining being giving a hot cock in missionary position, and the ass-man that I am worshiping my top's flexing ass. Occasionally, I will have a topping fantasy while lying down. Imagining a bubble butt hottie is riding my dick. However, my usual fantasy while lying down has me as a bottom.

As I said before, this was not the first time I was asked the question of which do I prefer, and I paused in answering all those other times, too. This was just the first time I ever analyzed my pause, and explained it briefly out loud to the person asking.

With that said, what made me hold out on answering the question before and this time was because I felt if I said "bottom", that it would make people assume that I was a versatile bottom, which I'm not. And I'm not saying there's something wrong with anyone who is. I simply know that as I have said in the past, I'm a very accommodating lover. I can make myself into what you need me to be in order for you my playmate to feel comfortable and sexually satisfied. Primarily by being an erotic mirror to my partner. For being his erotic mirror means being the sexual opposite he needs to be fulfilled. And only someone 100% versatile can do that.

While I explained just a little bit as to why I prefer bottoming. I did wonder to myself as to why I felt the need to explain. And just as quick as I asked myself that question, I quickly gave myself a reply.

It's because like I said, so much in our community makes being a bottom seem like a bad thing. Especially if you're a gay black male bottom
And for any and every color and ethnicity, bottoming is not rewarded. It is instead punished and ridiculed.

Look at sites like Men.com, which I've complained about a lot for this reason. And NakedKombat which makes the loser of the wrestling match have to bottom, and the bottoms don't look pleased.
They even more so don't look pleased on ActiveDuty, where I recall one scene some years ago featuring a guy who was wincing while he bottomed. And later in the scene, when the wincing bottom was able to top,  a scene description pops up on the screen to say that the once-wincing bottom "gets his revenge". My feeling is that there would be no need for the once-wincing bottom to "get his revenge" if he was enjoying his bottoming experience in the first place.

The porn industry (gay or straight) has little care if the one being penetrated is experiencing pleasure or pain. Producers/directors' sole concern is that the penetrating top has a cumshot so they can say, "End of scene, so my bank goes ka-ching!"

So this post is me proudly claiming that YES, I'm versatile, and while I prefer bottoming, I don't tolerate none of the aforementioned is self-loathing shit were taught to take thanks to porn.

An example of bottoms being ridiculed in our everyday lives is a "joke" I was once told 2nd hand.

It goes a little something like, "What do you call a guy with a small dick?... Duh! A bottom."

That "joke" to me is nothing more than another sign of gays being their own worst enemy. By displaying overcompensating macho bullshit at a bottom's expense. So the only one to find this humorous is an ungrateful top with no respect for any of his bottoming partners.

And bottoms definitely deserve respect and praise. For it takes a lot of manhood to be a bottom when you consider how anal sex was once considered a means to demean one's manhood. So one finding pleasure in taking any size cock up the ass is without a doubt a signed of evolved manhood. Especially if a bottom is doing it without poppers. Therefore, since it's 2017, those who demean bottoming need to catch up with the times.

And I'm not just saying this because I prefer bottoming, and don't use poppers. The proof is seen with every bottom you  have ever played with, and gave you ass so good that after you came there was a smile formed by 2 holes on your body - 1) your mouth, and 2) the hole on your dick while it was shooting out your jizz load, and after.

So as I'm proclaiming my preference for bottoming, that does not mean that the ass-man that I also proclaim to be has died. I still have the lust to put my cock in a hot guy's  ass, and cum from its tight warmth inside, and seeing and feeling his buns jiggle on the outside.

However, I do get off on being underestimated, then becoming more powerful than you were told to believe. And my past sex tales as a bottom, plus my past, present, and future blog and social media posts all show how those of us who truly know how to bottom are far from the weak creatures we have been led to believe, and asked to portray. Hence why this confession was most necessary.

Sunday, January 1, 2017

He Fucked So Good, But You Didn't Know....

There was a guy I had seen a number of times on Adam4Adam as someone who checked out my profile. I saw him again on Grindr, and tried hitting him up to no avail. Also, a few times in between those Adam4Adam and Grindr instances, I ran into him in a bar backroom where we went down on each other. With each of those backroom encounters making me think that one of those sucking sessions would lead to one of our cocks going into the other's ass.

After a long while, one night recently it finally happened. He was letting this guy go down on him, while an older guy and an Asian tried getting in the mix. I was standing on the outskirts of them all just observing. However, when this former suitor looked up and saw me, he tried pulling me into the mix. Once I got pulled in, the Asian left.

Such racist Asians hope to fit in to racist white culture by assimilating racist whites in such instances. They either try knocking a smaller black man (like myself) out of the way, or like in this instance, they leave the group action adopting a "No Blacks" attitude. All the while justifying Karma to come for them in the future. Given them the same future those racist whites will endure. One of buying companionship (with prostitutes and tricking go-go boys), instead of genuine, affectionate companionship. Because Karma is just that bitch, and I love her for it.

Anyway, as his focus on me got more intense, the other 2 guys left. I often feel bad for guys in that predicament because I've been that guy who becomes an after-thought. And I usually part ways with a guy who does others that way. This time however, the difference is that we have a history of courting and playing together, which makes a great difference to me.

When the guy who was going down on him left, it left a space on the sofa. So my suitor sat there for me to go down on him. So with pleasure I did. I loved sucking his dick and groping his nice ass so much that I could feel the workout my jaw muscles were getting, but I kept going. Because if my ass wasn't going to massage and suck the cum out of him, my goal was to have my mouth do it. Then he said the magic words to me,....

"I want to fuck you."

I didn't know if he wanted it right there, or in the bathroom, which I knew was full of guys getting it on by that time. I soon got my answer when he led the way to the bathroom.

I was thrilled to see that my former, now present suitor was just as much of an exhibitionist as I am. I was also thrilled to see that while we were in a bathroom with a lot of other guys, I was his focus.

Besides his cock filling my ass, I also loved feeling the bare skin of his groin slap against my ass cheeks. I looked behind me to see the light make the sweat on his shoulders and chest glisten. With the sweat from his chest wetting my back more than it already was from my own sweat. And each turn back, his thrusts into me made the amount of sweat to see glistening grow.

For public sex, he was lasting awhile. Then I could hear the moans of a man on the verge of orgasm. With so many guys in that bathroom, and around us, I wasn't sure it was my playmate. It became obvious after piecing together his increasing hard thrusts and his cock throbbing more rapidly inside me. Not to mention his voice saying "I'm gonna cum". Initially indistinguishable because of him saying it during the onset of his orgasm.

Afterwards, he asked if I was coming back the next night, which was the underwear party. He said he was asking because he would definitely be there, but he wasn't using that revelation to pressure me into showing up. I told him there was no pressure, because I most likely would be there anyway. Unfortunately, due to the track record of many gay males, I didn't put much faith in seeing him the next night.

Well come the next night, he was there.

We greeted each other, and that was about it. At first. As the night progressed, I continued my usual routine of observing behavior. He didn't know this about me so while he was talking to a white regular. I was sitting on the side enjoying my accumulation of knowledge.

While he was talking to the regular, he looked over and saw me, then called me over. Since like I said before, he didn't know about my enjoying the art of observation, I don't know if his invitation was because he thought I was lonely, or because he really wanted me. Whatever the case, I went over thinking I would be brief, then move on. Wrong. He kept me around, which I didn't think was a good idea.

For I know the white regular he was talking to sometimes goes to play with other white guys at a black guy's house, but he himself doesn't play with black guys, With this reason in tow, I figured this was not going to be the most comfortable of groupings.

My playmate led us to the bathroom. Me and the regular made out with him one at a time. Unlike most 3-ways, for obvious reasons, a 3-way kiss never ensued this time. Eventually, the regular had enough of trying, and decided to leave. So me and my playmate picked up where we left off, and upped the ante on our playing. He undid his pants, and my anticipation of him unveiling his cock to me again made me feel like I could hear the sound of his button being pulled out through the button hole over the loud music. So as soon as I saw a slight glimpse of his dick beneath his pubes, I dropped to the floor to go down on him.

There was a guy there watching us. He never tried to intervene, but he did later try to copy us,and take credit for what we started (told in much greater detail in a 12/4/2016 Facebook post). There were others who intervened however. And because of them we stopped. We did later come back though. This time, our actions did all of the talking to say, "We know you're going to try to interrupt and crash our party, but we are going to fuck without you!"

So he put me up against the wall with me wearing for this underwear party, some thigh-high tube socks, a cut-off t-shirt, and a jockstrap. He put his hard cock in me, and I was loving his dick all over again. The socially inept tried coming in to put their hands where they shouldn't. But we were so into each other that we dismissed them, and made them have to live vicariously through another pairing, but not ours.

While I don't usually like it, this time my playmate pulled out. He had me give him a blowjob, then he shot his load in my mouth. I took no issue with it because the night before, I did get the pleasure of feeling his cock throb inside me due to my ass milking him so good. So the night before my ass tasted his milk, and this time, my mouth got to taste it.

Lastly, this may have been a great sex tale, one thing I did not reveal about this hot guy throughout the entire story is the fact that he's a drag queen. I don't know if he was aware that I knew that even before our Adam4Adam and Grindr sightings of each other. And it really shouldn't make a difference, but I'm telling this tale because his behavior exceeds the expectations too many gay males have about the sexuality of drag queens.

However, this is only 1 drag queen. So what conclusion can be made about others?....

You can find out in my 2nd post for my column "X-Rayed Sex" for the Tumblr blog, Thotyssey.

Fleshlight Launch

Lust Cinema