With possible interviews to consider, my blogging, poetry, and intended book-writing, my schedule doesn't exactly permit me time to commit to the possibility of making my next 5 consecutive Thursday nights available to partake in something like a go-go dancing contest. But I took this as an opportunity to do some investigative reporting to see if the lack of black go-go boys in the more popular parties was just a figment of my imagination, or was it really still very much at play as I stated in those past blog posts.
As I have with other posts addressing racism in the gay community, I emailed the link to "On Racist Blast: NYC's Go-Go Dancing Scene" to the editor of the NYC gay nightlife magazine, Next. But I got no response. It seems silence on the issue of racism is very much Next Magazine's forte. OR if they do address it, they do so in a fashion that makes the very culprits of the racism seem like their doing their best to combat it like they did with their article "White Cocks Only". I guess that's what happens when you're a free publication combining lacking journalistic integrity with being bought off by the culprits' advertising dollars.
T.J. also criticized my dance moves as being very porn related, or something along those lines. That could be insulting to me if my self-esteem was weak enough to rely on the likes of him. And for that reason, some past and present porn actors may be insulted considering how:
1) I am a former porn actor;
2)Most porn actors that he's probably seen are White, who just hop around like bunnies and can't really dance to save their lives; and
3)Many porn actors male and female, gay and straight start out as go-go dancers. In fact, some of the contestants from past years of that very contest also did gay porn.
Such nonsense ramblings only further my point of T.J. Kelly playing to the cameras.
Now, I could have played along by playing to the cameras and being a just a much a pretentious bitch as I threw all these facts in his face. But instead, someone had to handle themselves like an man in this situation, and show some decorum. So I let that someone be me...for the moment.
At the end of the contest, it came down to me and a straight Latino go-go boy with the same number of votes. We were about to have a dance-off. T.J. Kelly originally gave a vote of "No Go" because he considered that contestant "gay-for-pay". Since go-go boys being straight is not as big a concern to me as gay porn actors claiming to be "straight", I felt making that a choice to eliminate the dancer was T.J. once again playing to the camera. In whatever the dancer said in return however, during this point T.J. reconsidered his vote.
T.J. then proceeds to look over at me and tell me that I have a "beautiful face". Then he pauses. During that long pause, I started moving my hand to signify "hurry up". T.J. gave me a blank look that said either "what is that for?" or "How dare you?"
Now since he seemed so bewildered as to what I was trying to say, plus I've amassed all the information that I needed about everything and everyone, my brain decided to stop being "Mr. Congeniality", and verbalize by saying, "SPIT IT OUT! Hurry it up! We ain't got all night!"
I decided since he wanted to play to the cameras at my expense, then I'm going to play to them AND the crowd at his.
And on that note, T.J. went back to criticizing my shoes and socks. Which I'm sure would have been the case, even if I stood there and said nothing.
Let it be known, that while I am in no way saying that this particular go-go boy has internalized any homophobia by him saying he's straight but dancing in gay bars/clubs, there are some who do. And the reason they do is because just as I said in my reply to the Next Magazine article "White Cocks Only", of how it's more profitable for light-complexioned ethnicities to internalize their homophobia in the porn industry, the same can be said for the go-go dancing scene as well. This night proved that in spades.
Because I after the moves I mentioned doing earlier, plus following their instructions while performing of showing more skin by exposing my ass and, while they all said that I had good energy, some of the judges still had the nerve to ask me to "bring it". What the fuck more do they want from me after that drop, back-bend, and half-split?! A handstand?! A cartwheel?! A back-flip?!
Believe me, for the aforementioned reason of my schedule, I am not taking this contest that seriously. I entered this contest and am addressing this situation with the energy and from the viewpoint of a Black go-go boy in a mostly White venue without my busy schedule. And in the end, I found myself being passed over for a straight guy who didn't do as much on that stage in a contest. So while Blacks are so often accused of homophobia, the sight of situations like this makes a proud gay Black man wonder, "Why bother?"
After posting the link to "On Racist Blast: NYC's Go-Go Dancing Scene" on Facebook the next day, and tagging him in my intro to the link, his reply to my intro was, "Sorry you feel that way. It's not that deep just a gogo contest at the monster and I didn't agree on the other 2 white and latin dancers."
Now, anyone with sense knows that's a generic excuse one uses to cover their ass. And of course he didn't feel obligated to advance those others he gave a "No Go" to. They've never worked for him like some of the others that he voted for. Which may very well explain in a city FULL of go-go boys and great diversity why there was only 6 of us there with so little diversity among us 6.
Another thing that raised suspicion about the small number is the fact of how the contest starts early enough that go-go boys working on a Thursday night in Manhattan can get to their gig at a decent time after the contest. With that in mind, ask yourself this question:
If you were a go-go boy who was Black, Asian, or not of a light-complexion, would you enter a contest knowing that one of the judges is a party promoter who has ONLY White and light-complexioned Latino go-go boys in his dancer roster?
I didn't think you would. Hence the small turnout of dancing contestants. It's because between that and the above picture that introduces him into this post, the writing is on the wall.
So what was missing during my first post, and what I must sadly report is STILL missing in the go-go dancing scene is the lack of racism in the party promoters and the crowd that their ugly vibe of racism brings into the venues.
This is not me being a sore loser. Because like I said earlier, my present schedule doesn't really permit me dedicating myself to something as mundane as that contest.. But for the sake of this report, I was willing to reschedule things in order to take this as far as I could, so I could get some positive results. Instead of the negative results from this little contest that show us signs of a BIG problem in the gay community ----RACISM.